The Cowboys Real Problem

Yesterday’s loss comes down to one major issue that continues to be a problem for Dallas… Pass Defense.  I know the running game was a no show yesterday but at least Marion and Julius have proved this season the running game can work and work well.

The pass defense has yet to show me anything, last season and this season.  Unless it improves soon teams will continue to pick the Cowboys apart.

So Where is Jessica Simpson?

Attention all Grant’s Rant readers, I have a question for you: Has Jessica Simpson been banned from attending Cowboys Games?  I have not seen her at any games this season, not that she would want to travel to Green Bay anyway.  Unless you are a die hard football fan/buff Green Bay would not be the first choice of travel destinations.

But it still begs the question, to avert a PR nightmare, has Tony told her to watch from home?  The reality is with each game the Cowboys win, the more dangerous it becomes for Jessica Simpson to show up at a game.  For all those idiots who believe in the Jessica Jinx, if the Cowboys lose the first game Simpson attends,  forgetaboutit!!!! (as we say in NY)

The Jessica Jinx, Not Broken Yet!

Headline News declared the Jessica Jinx over, when the Cowboys beat the Eagles last night.  Though I never really believed in the Jessica Jinx, as a firm believer in other Jinxes, just because the Cowboys won does not break the so called Jinx.

I don’t think Jessica Simpson was even in the stands last night.  If she were I am sure ESPN would have been constantly cutting away to her instead of Jerry Jones.  So until Jessica Simpson wears that now infamous pink jersey to a Cowboys victory, the jinx, technically, is still on.

But I must reiterate, I never believed Jessica or her jersey was the cause of the Jinx, but since so many people do, and I am an authority on bad luck (I’m a poker player), I just thought I would clarify the situation.

Hard Knocks Rocks

It’s not often I tout the greatness of shows on other networks, but would you expect anything less from HBO.  Hardo Knocks is following the Dallas Cowboys this year and it is the perfect blend of documentary and reality programming all in one.

The show gives fans an “inside the ropes” look at what goes on at camp.  The players seem to have let their guard down a bit for the HBO cameras giving us an interesting perspective on team chemistry and what to expect this year.

As a TV man myself, I can appreciate what it takes to turn this show around.  Many producers will shoot ten days of footage then spend six months on writing and editing the final version.  Hard Knocks is turned around in just days.  It is an impressive feat to be sure.

Jessica Watch in Full Effect, Secret Agents Posted

Sam Hale -NBC5

It is Cowboys mania out in Oxnard and has happy as the fans are for the return of players and coaches, they are really waiting for the arrival of one more star, Jessica Simpson.

I have always loved reporting on the Jessica Simpson – Tony Romo Saga for one reason, and one reason only, it drives traffic to Grant’s Rant. The fact is, I am never afraid to “Pimp” my blog for a little publicity. 

I now have sources placed all over Oxnard ready to call me as soon as the lovely singer arrives.  Any news related to Jessica and Tony, you will find it here on Grant’s Rant thanks to the brave men who agreed to be enlisted for the very important job of “Jessica Watch.”

Agent 1: C.J. Johnson (above):  Not only does he have the eyes of a hawk, but if there is a pretty girl around C.J. will spot her.  And he loves talking on the phone so he’s happy for one more job that gives him a reason to call someone.

Agent 2: Sam Hale (above):  Nicknamed the “Sports Master,” Sam secretly knows the key to Cowboys success is unearthing the truth behind the “Jessica Jinx.”  While producing for sports for Newy, Sam is well aware his first responsibility is actually working as a secret agent on the look out for one lovely singer.

Both Sam and C.J. tell me they have inside sources that tell them, Jessica will arrive on Thursday.  So far both agents tell me Tony has been preforming well at camp.  The first test will be if he can keep it up after his girlfriend arrives.

Wade and His Gangsta Wardrobe

Ron Jenkins Star-Telegram

I had to laugh when I saw this picture of Cowboys Head Coach Wade Phillips in the Star-T this morning.  Is he trying to make some kind of bizarre effort to fit in with his players?  Those are about as big and baggy as shorts can get.  I thought they were reserved for the youngsters being targeted by Dallas’s failed “Pull Up Your Pants” campaign.

He could hide Pac Man Jones in those shorts.  Do they double as his wife’s living room curtains?  Wade, I love you man, but your pushing senior citizen status and those shorts are just plain silly, unless you wear them with suspenders and big red shoes.

How about a nice pair of khaki Nike golf shorts?  Even blue ones with a nice pleat in front would work.  For some reason you just don’t pull off the “Gang Banger” look very well.  While we are at it, get some ankle socks too, the Doctor J. look is out as well.

 

Free PR Advice for Tony Romo

 

If Tony has a publicist and you know who it is, please forward this post to them.  Tony needs to learn how to deal with the Jessica Simpson saga.  Instead of remaining quiet and aloof about the subject embrace it.  Providing the two are very close and still going strong, which it sounds like they are, Tony needs to find a message that will get everyone off his back.

The biggest fear Cowboys fans have is that Jessica Simpson is a “distraction.”  To counter those fears Tony needs to come clean and say this:

“I am deeply in love with Jessica and she is a positive force in my life.  Not only do I feel happy around her, but she is a calming supportive voice.  When I am around her I feel at ease.  I no longer have a desire to go out and party all night long, I would rather spend an evening at home with her.  She has an amazing way of keeping me focused.”

That takes all the ammunition away from critics.  Plus, when you are trying to hide something, people always perceive a problem.  Try it Tony, you may find all the people that interview you will then be totally disarmed and even happy for you.

Jessica Simpson Will Be at the Cowboys Games!

Brace yourselves superstitious Cowboys fans!  Jessica Simpson is telling the San Francisco Chronicle she will be at the Cowboys games no matter what kind of hostile reception she receives.

Simpson and Cowboys star quarterback Tony Romo have been dating for 7 months now and Jessica Claims the two are still going strong.  Will she be a jinx this year?  (I personally don’t think she ever was a jinx, a distraction maybe.)  Who knows, I can tell you, the first game that Tony plays like a mope, the lovely singer will be the first one blamed for her honey’s poor performance.  Silly, but true!

Romo’s New Agent – Daddy Simpson?

NOT!!!

We all know Jessica Simpson’s Dad Joe, has been responsible for cooling off the two lovebirds.  The Boston Herald is now citing a reason!  Joe was pushing to be Tony agent!  He reportedly told The Cowboy superstar with the 67 million dollar contract to dump his current agent Creative Artists Agency and sign with big poppa. 

Jessica, can’t be happy about this, that is unless she was in on the plan all along… hmmmmmmm.

T.O. Gets His Pop Corn – Jerry Gets his Check Book

I have often compared Jerry Jones to George Steinbrenner.  The two are terrific owners that fans love to hate.  But what ever you say about the two ego maniacs, you can’t say they don’t write the checks needed for success.

Today’s signing of Terrel Owens to a 4 year 34 million dollar deal is the Cowboy’s latest step in securing a Super Bowl Ring.  T.O. is great, he has lived up to the hype and has been a top performer every step of the way.  There is no reason to think he won’t perform again this up-coming season.  Without his success, the Cowboys will be nothing.  If T.O. is great, it means Romo is great, which means every other receiver will have a chance to be great.

Lets all thank Jerry for getting Owens locked in long term.  But Lets also thank all the fans that line Jerry’s pockets year after year.  After all it really is your money ending up in Jerry’s (and T.O.s) bank account.